Just over a year ago we found out that Baby #2 was a second little girl. It’s funny because I always had this vision that I would have two girls, followed by a boy, yet I was convinced that this baby was in fact a boy. Having never found out the gender of our first baby I wasn’t sure how I should be feeling.
But hearing the sonographer say “I can’t see anything so it’s probably a girl” left this pit in my stomach. I was sure she had got it wrong. We were having a boy!
You hear about it all the time don’t you? Couples finding out the gender only to have the opposite. I was sure this was going to be us. So we booked a private scan for that weekend. By this point I was feeling pretty disappointed that we’d found out.
How ruddy awful does that sound? Lord I hate myself for writing this. It’s not that I didn’t want another girl but it’s like when you think your getting something but get given something different. I just had to be 100% sure.
So yeah back to our private scan. So so magical I would highly recommend one even if you don’t want to find out the gender! It was confirmed that our 20 week scan was correct.
In that moment seeing our little girl in such detail washed away all those feelings. I was destined to be a girl Mum just like my Mum! And I was excited to get prepared for ‘Baby Sister’.
Now that I have my two girls I could not imagine my life any other way. If we were to go on to have a third baby I would definitely not find out the gender. I much prefer the surprise and when that baby is placed in your arms can you really feel anything other than that overpowering feeling of love?
I wanted to find out other parent’s thoughts on finding out the gender and feelings surrounding the result so I took to Facebook.
“We found out both times – the first time was just so I could get organised and think of a name etc. The second time we already had a boy and I really wanted a girl. Finding out at 20 weeks we were having another boy gave me time to adjust and get over the disappointment. I’m glad we found out because I would have hated to feel that disappointment at the birth.” I’m so glad I’m not alone with the feeling of disappointment as Sarah also felt the same!
Hayley from Devon Mama has the right idea if you ask me. “We were team yellow. I know people have their reasons for finding out but we had none, it would have purely been for our nosiness! I liked the fact that I didn’t know until the birth, it added a little bit more magic to it for us. Plus it was wonderful being able to tell all our friends and family. I’d do the same again, I have no preference over gender at all or no need to find out so I’ll be keeping it a surprise next time as well!”
“I was upset when I found out I was having a third boy. I cried. Not because I was sad to be having a boy but because I was saying goodbye to the daughter I had always imagined I would have.” I think I would be exactly the same (hence the reason I will not be finding out IF we have a third) as Emma.
Lucy found out the gender of her second for the same reasons as me. “I blogged about why we chose to find out the gender of our second (and not our first). For me it was about helping my first born adjust to becoming a big sister and helping us prepare. We kept all Erin’s clothes so being another girl was very handy in terms of saving money!”
“I found out with my first but not with my second. My partner was told and pretty much everyone in the family knew apart from me! I wanted the surprise of looking down after giving birth & finding out whether it was Tristan or Emily. I bought a few neutral pieces but the family had been squirrelling away lots of dresses for her once she arrived.” Wow how Emma had the self control to not pester all her family to find out!